Tuesday, January 6, 2009

“Do yourself a favor – forgive and watch your worries fade.”

December 31, being the last day of the year 2008 is a crucial time for a lot where we prepare for the coming year and even reflect. By now, I believe a lot of people have made their own resolutions for the year 2009. As for me, I’m going over 2008 and see how it has and how it will change me for the better.

I turned 18 this year. Yes, the legal age – drinking liquor at bars, driving and even voting. I’ve done the first two but voting? I haven’t actually thought of getting my voter’s ID yet but I want to vote. Somewhere, I thought of how important voting is because before, I was totally against it. Of course, I wasn’t affected by the society’s problems yet.

The greatest failure of my life - yet. It was April when I went to the 3^rd floor lobby of Adenaur Building in SLU. I couldn’t say if I expected my name to be in the list of students taken for the quota. But then when I looked, it wasn’t there. At the same time, when I took my grades, I failed Physics. That’s why I didn’t enter the quota. I felt the world crumble above me.

I officially became a student nurse – Capping and Pinning Ceremony at Easter College. After I enrolled to Easter College, I became lax with my studies. I observed that it was a totally new place. I didn’t expect such school that had one building for the Nursing, Engineering, HRM and even Education courses. Besides that, I knew I was receiving quality education. I didn’t find NCM 100 that hard but it was a new subject matter that focused on a lot of theories. Being a priority for the sewing of my uniforms (I was one of the students whose average for prelims was high); I was really excited to wear it as soon as possible. By then, we were practicing our songs, our seating arrangement (which was disarranged a lot of times), and our positions during the song and even the capping and pinning. It was May when the ceremony took place. It was a real highlight of my soon-to-be profession.

My first duty before the Capping ceremony. I wouldn’t forget how I scored so low for my first duty. I’ll admit I was careless before. I had trouble with the TPR (temperature-pulse-respiratory rate) sheet, the giving of medications (I didn’t understand TID, BID, OD and even anti-emetics bla-bla), and even specific interventions to patients with special cases. Hello naman kasi, first time naming magduty at linagay kami sa Medical Ward na wala man lang 4^th year na kasama samantalang yung ibang groups may mga kasama sila argh. So there, my grade for that duty was 75.1. I sure learned from those mistakes and still learning more. I’m not the type who would give suppositories via oral route, the type who doesn’t even know KVO (third year, second semester na po) and even those who’d fast-drip their IV lines so as not to be delayed.

The last time I saw and met up with Ice Cream. It was sad for me because he just let me walk out of him (for the first time) after I got mad at him. Was I being unreasonable when he didn’t show up at the meeting place? I waited for like an hour for him. After that, I didn’t text him and he didn’t either. Lately, I don’t know how he got my new number but he texted me. I missed him but I won’t admit it.

My grandfather (father side) died. A big loss to the family, his death brought out issues among the members as well as the relatives. I didn’t know that such things existed. Paano naman kasi, kung sana sinabi pa noon at hindi inipon, sana hindi ganito na parang hindi magkaka-pamilya. A lot would talk like it’s the fault of those who left grandpa. I was forcing them to bring grandpa to the hospital when his case wasn’t that crucial yet. What did they tell me? Wag na at sinisipon lang ang lolo mo. Naulanan lang siya. He needed suctioning badly and I knew. My aunt was the one who told me that so I respected what she wanted. Pinapamukha sa akin na wala akong alam – fine. Hindi na ako nakialam pagkatapos nun, alam ko naman na may sasabihin siya kapag aalagaan ko si lolo. I went to check on grandpa when she asked me to because she said she’s going out so I did. He wasn’t doing well and I told them again to bring him to the hospital but it was grandpa who said he didn’t want to. The next night we went to La Union, he passed away. Things happened so quickly and we got blamed for it. The result? I don’t know but I know when I’m not wanted so I go off. As for me, I do things for them as a sign of respect – hindi naman ako bastos para hindi makipag-usap.

All the special people I know were able to celebrate their birthday this year. My parents, my brothers and even my grandfather (mother side) were able to celebrate his 86^th birthday and I’m happy about it. My friends and even enemies did celebrate their birthday this year too.

For all these things I’m happy about, I thank God for another year that he has bestowed upon me and my family. Significant events (and some that I may have forgotten) that shaped me to who I am now didn’t only affect me but as well as to those who are around me.

RESOLUTIONS? Haha. I’ll name some.

· I’ll wake up earlier, and maximize my time so I’ll be able to help in some chores. Sigh, I hope so haha.

· My pride shouldn’t be an essential anymore. I must forgive and forget. Everyone makes mistakes especially me. So why should I be a snob? Seriously, I’ll try.

· Time is so precious I should be conscious of it. I’ll spend more time with my family and friends. I’ve been totally engrossed with school work I forget a lot of things.

· I’ll cut down my diet. I should really be aware of my health now that I gained more than 10kgs.

I couldn’t think of additional ones yet. I’m not really good with resolutions hihi.

The book that inspired me this year: Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom

The song that caught my attention this month (it would be unfair to say year): Love bug by the Jonas’ Brothers and Clinically Dead for Sixteen Hours by the Camerawalls.

The person who has made a big impact to my life till now (aside from my family and friends): Mr. Ice Cream

The show(s) that inspired me with ideas: Heroes series, Gossip Girl series and The Playlist (at MTV. :P)

And lastly, the quote that I love the most: “When you’re in bed, you’re dead.” By Morrie Schwartz. The quote inspired me that there’s more to life than lying down. When we’re lying in bed and sleeping, we only achieve dreams but when we get up and work our desires, we achieve life.

2008 has offered a big change to my life. I’m very happy that I came across a lot of people who became my friends and even enemies. Everyone has taught me a lesson in life. Now, I’m ready to face 2009 with a bang!

And oh, a picture I'd like to share with you all to remind you that nature is indeed splendid!:]

*Caption: I took this at Atok, Benguet - highest point.